My Own Personal Ground Hog's Day

As you all know I live in Asheville. It's a Hamlet in the mountains of Western North Carolina. We have one celebrity living here who is alive. Thomas Wolfe came from Asheville but not many people still know who he is (go, read, you will enjoy). Moog used to live here but he passed away about a year ago. Please don't tell me you don't know who Moog is. We may have a lot of celebrities in the celebrities to humans ratio, but maybe not a lot in the big city celebrities to human ratios. I am not sure. I never looked at the statisitcs on that kind of stuff. So we have our one celebrity.
I think our one celebrity might be stalking me. No, really, listen to the facts:
For about 2 months we took the same flight to and from Atlanta. when I was ready to finally say hi to her she stopped taking that flight. Most of the consultants in Asheville at least know eachother by sight and most are pretty friendly with eachother. She saw us all talking but we are too respectful of a famous person's space to talk to her. Maybe she stopped taking the flight because we hurt her feelings, maybe she felt excluded, I am not willing to rule it out.

Next: She atarted showing up at OUR favorite sushi place and she sits behind us with her youngest daughter and a friend every time we are all there. It is our restaurant. When we get there the waitresses hug out daughter and have since she was about 3. In fact, it was the only restaurant we could really take her to for awhile (since it was all we wanted to eat). We sit in the same place when we are there and she always gets there after us and always sits behind us. Our child eats raw fish and loves it, my husband is a very good dad.
BTW - Our child will not eat tunafish. Doesn't even really like tuna tataki.
Next: We brought Noodle to see the Wizard of Oz at the community theatre and guess who was there? Yep, her and her daughter. She has started smiling at me, I think she realizes I know her game. I can be really nice, she could just come over and say hi and I would be friendly and I wouldn't even charge her*.
Another BTW- Our celebrity is actually prettier in person than on TV and I thought she was quite pretty on TV. Oh, and she has REALLY big feet. And she is really skinny. Maybe her feet aren't that big but she is so skinny that they look bigger. Her hair looks the way I wish my hair looked but I don't really have envy becuase she can pay gets paid a gazillion dollars for her hair to look like that and I don't get paid anything to look stellar all the time (yet somehow I do). When she talks she sounds a bit fake but I am sure she is sick of people talking with her. Her daughter is very pretty and very well behaved. She played with Noodle at the sushi restaurant one night because she had these sequined shoes that Noodle couldn't stop staring at. Our daughter, seemingly hypnotized by the shoes wandered over to the table and they played. Noodle gave her stickers. Ithink this was Noodle's first brush with fame.
All told, I think it is a bit strange that I see this one person more than any other stranger in the city. If I wasn't going to embarass my husband to no end I would definitely just go up and talk to her, but not like 'Hi, you are so great, blah blah blah.' More like 'Hi, stop stalking me, you could just say hi and we could make small talk like I do with about 200 other people in this town and go our merry ways. I don't want your autograph.' I am not sure if she would see the humor and I am not sure I really want to piss off a famous person who is stalking me.
I do find it strange that she keeps showing up where I am. I think if she gets a membership to the JCC pool then I will be truly worried, because she lives on the other side of town, she isn't jewish and she probably has a membership to a swanky country club if she doesn't have a pool in her backyard.

I like to remember that even if though I am paranoid, it doesn't mean they aren't out to get me.

* During the few weeks I was home I came up with wonderful little sayings like 'I am paid to be clean and nice.' This was after I hadn't showered for days and couldn't seem to smile. My husband really is a saint.