Quick Wins

In corporate America there is a term called 'quick wins.' There isn't a good definition that I could find, only examples of them but it basically means that you assess the issues a client is having, triage them and quickly fix the ones you can while planning on how to figure out the bigger issues. In consulting if you aren't part of the solution there's good money to be made prolonging the problem. So I am in Norfolk these days, missing NYC like it's noone's business. I am back toa schedule of: get up, go to work, work until 7 or 8, go back to the room, microwave some soup (or order thai), play yahoo towers, read, sleep (if I am lucky). I feel sort of like a little kid, I realize I need to wear myself out a little more if I want to fall asleep before 1 am (I get up at 6). I must exercise. Fortunately, the woman I am working with, my 'super user', has lost 60 lbs in the last year through Weight Watchers and Curves. This is not a hot bed of chocolate like in Dallas (where I gained 10 pounds in 5 months, ugh, but it was so good). At the end of the month Curves has a membership drive that if you donate canned goods to Curves (for needy families) they waive the $150 joining fee. Consider me in, 30 minute work out a few times a week. I can do that, I am sure. She also felt that if all I do is work out I should get toned up a bit, she doesn't consider me fat (I love this woman). Anyway, back to the quick wins, the low hanging, fruit, the things I did that have already raised my to the status of minor deity, uber-consultant:
1. I showed them three things that halfed their work time, it took about 30 minutes to show them and they all love me.
2. I am teaching them how to use their ad-hoc reporting system which is very easy to use and they love it (as Wheezy would say on Dragon Tales ' LOVE IT!')
3. I showed the super user how to control her out of control, maniacal purchasing staff so that they stop making all these issues that they insist are the fault of the ERP system we are using when they are really user errors.
And for these 3 easy things I think they are building me a shrine in the next room. Goddess Arwen accepts donations.
The rest starts getting tough but that brings me to the next thing they love about me: I tell them no. OK, it isn't that I say "no, I am not going to do that". It's that I say "No, you don't want to do that, here's why: blah blah blah" and they think that's great. If they feel they still need to do these things I tell them I will help them do it on their own but take no ownership of what they are trying to do. Easy (do you hear me wiping me hands of all potentially messy situations? Oh yes, I am).
So all in all, this will be a great project for me.
Norfolk is a bit quirky though. First, there are a lot of men in sailor outfits. Oh, be still my beating heart. Sailors are hot. I am not sure why I feel this way but I do. If Hubby showed up in a sailor outfit I would laugh my ass off but the real deal is quite sexy. One of my friend's up in Mass. has a thing for paramedics and I think I have a soft spot for sailors, not that I would ever act upon it or anything. Hubby has a thing for Angelina Jolie and I am pretty sure he would act on it if she showed up at our front door (which is why I trained our dog to attack anyone with the name angelina or jolie, just to be on the safe side).
Norfolk also has some of the worst drivers ever. This is coming from a woman who learned to drive on the south east expressway in Boston. It's a scary dangerous place to drive. I will be merging onto a higway with no break down lane, just guardrails, and there will be a sweet spot to merge into and the person in the lane already will accelerate into that spot making me either have to slam on the brakes or crash into them. This has happened about 8 times since I have been here. Also, half the cars have special vanity license plates with cute sayings like 'OTOMUCH' and 'BLLPLYR'. I can't stand these, all of Hubby's family has them and they are all nuts. I can give you MIL stories that will leave you sucking your thumb in fetal position, no joke, I start balling up just thinking about her. I have seen incrdibly bad driving and, low and behold, a lot of car accidents. My commute should be 5 minutes and it hasn't been less than 20 yet. There is always an accident. Craziness.All in alll, I think if I could have this project in Newark I would be the happiest camper around.